Get into the venue early. Right at 11. Time to treat yourself to a nice lunch and cocktail. I recommend trying to find PDTIKI, a hidden tiki bar curated by NYC’s PDT. Last year it was somewhere in the Craft Beer Barn. Be on the lookout for a something that belongs in the tropics and you’ll be able to find your way in.
Get some Texas BBQ at Bludso’s after that.
Head to the Mojave tent by 12:10 for the first set of the day. It’s from Australian band Rolling Blackouts Coastal Fever. And the great news is that you can catch the whole set.
After they finish at 1:10, you have about an hour and a half to roam. Get lost. Check out some art. Take part in some “extra-curricular activities.” Nap. Hydrate. All the above.
But then get ready to get loose for THEY. At the Mojave tent at 2:40.
After that set, hit the bathroom. It’s still early enough in the day that they won’t smell THAT BAD.
Head to the Coachella stage for the indie pop up and comers LANY next. They go on at 3:35.
Time for lunch. Maybe a nice refreshing Acai bowl from Backyard Bowls near the VIP tents?
That’ll give you the energy you’ll need for FIDLAR at the Mojave tent at 4:55.
Cut their set short and head to the Sonora tent at 5:20 for sultry Latin R&B sounds of Cuco. You are bound to feel really old, but that’s ok.
After his set, you’ll have about 45 minutes to do whatever you want. May I recommend checking out a random band you’ve never heard of? That’s one of the best parts of Coachella.
But make sure you are at the Coachella stage for Portugal. The Man. Still one of the best live bands out there. I should hope so too. They’ve only been doing it for 14 years. Check out the video above for proof.
If you are into the whole Jazz and Hip Hop mix, cut P.tM’s set short and head to the Outdoor stage for Kamasi Washington, which is bound to have plenty of surprise guests.
After that set go to the lesser known Heineken House to catch Busta Rhymes doing a DJ set. Cause, you know, it’s Busta.
Ibeyi will be doing her set at the Gobi tent right in the middle of that, so if you are into her, make sure you only stay at the Heineken House for a little bit.
Miguel will also be taking the stage at the Outdoor spot at 8:30 so make sure you catch some of that.
The sun is down and your stomach is rumbling. Time to ingest your last meal of the festival. Maybe a hot dog? Maybe an overpriced fancy hot dog? Try Sumo Dog in the Craft Beer Barn.
Do it quickly though, cause the set of the day starts at 9:30 in the Sahara tent. Migos are about cook up all sorts of goodness there.
I would split my time with Migos and head to the Outdoor tent for A Perfect Circle. Anything Maynard touches is bound to be entertaining to watch.
At this point, most people will be heading to watch Eminem, which you totally should if you are a fan. But you are probably tired. You are probably over it. Your allergies are killing you. Your feet feel like they are on fire. So why not just lay down somewhere on the cool grass and stare at the desert sky? Or go to get angry with Eminem. Your choice.
It’s done. You did it. Time to head back to wherever your reality is and dream about all the pain and good times next year. Will you do it all again? Of course you will. Anything for music.